[학생 작문] Civil war has been  observed as  U.S’ most cruel war that  brought more casualties than any other wars. The Civil War was not an incident  occurred by sudden ignition. Since  United States’ independence from Great Britain, the seeds of conflict had been  implanted. It was Fugitive Slave Act of 1817 that  implied the conflict over  slavery system. The consequences of civil war were catastrophic and  era of Reconstruction began in 1865  to recover political and economic scars that  civil war left  to the nation  until 1877.
 As shown above,  Fugitive Slave Act  was very beginning to ignite the  conflicts over slaves. As  Fugitive Slave Act allowed slave owners to recapture escaped slaves, their treatment towards slaves was harsh and cruel. Thus, as  cotton industry prospered in  South, more slaves for labors were required to fulfill their economic interest. Through  railroad, Southern planters , mostly Democrat,  owned more and more slaves  and slaves’ animosity and distrust towards whites  were extreme. As  North  appealed slavery’s cruelty and inhumanity ,  they waged the first compromise, Missouri Compromise in 1819 by President Andrew Jackson. In order to balance the power of each partition, he divided the nation by 36° 20’. It was his attempt to appease  conflict between  South and  North  though it was  momentary. As many Black’s harsh lives as slaves were portrayed in literature such as Uncle Tom’s Cabin, many  Northern even who were indifferent , became active  opponent of  slavery system. As  Compromise of 1850 and  Kansas Nebraska Act of 1854 followed, the hatred towards each other were rather increased, not pacified. Finally, it was “Bleeding Kansas” and  “Fred Scott Case”  when those hatreds exploded. To threaten President Lincoln,  few southern states proclaimed secession. However, as Lincoln failed to compromise with those states, most of  southern states seceded and formed  “Confederacy.” Even though many presidents endeavored to  make the better solution for this relentless conflict,  civil war seemed inevitable.  Started with Jackson’s popular sovereignty  to give citizens the right to decide  slavery system, many presidents  had hardships to balance  South and  North. It was the matter of existence of slavery system; however, it became the misunderstanding and distrust.  Now, Civil War finally was waged between Southerners who  just tried to endure and be admitted as a nation with lack of capital, technology, labors, and political unity and Northerners who tried to persuade  south and repeal  their secession  with taking advantages of capital, railroad, technology.
After the eight years of Civil War, the Reconstruction was  absolutely required. Under the name of  Reconstruction Act of 1867, the United States focused on  South’s rejoinment of Union and  Black’s freedom out of slavery system. As  Union won the war, Blacks now had full equality and freedom.  14, 15, 16th amendments ascertained their freedom, equality and enfranchisement. Also,  women, too had social advances as they  involved in professional careers. However,  southerners who worked for cotton industry collapsed  for lack of labor. Therefore,  they created new farming systems called “Sharecropping” and  “Crop-lien system .”  They encouraged Blacks to work  for cotton industry as well as Black Code did.  In political aspect, Republicans were divided  by Radicals and  Liberals who quarreled over the methods to accept southerners .  In economy, as Civil War  left destructive influence, Union concerned about economic revitalization a lot. However, their efforts evaporated as railroad system faltered by superfluous creation, which was “ Panic of 1873.”(이하 줄임)
[Comment] 매우 잘 구성된 에세이다. 문법적인 부분에서 약간의 실수가 있지만 전반적으로 매우 잘 쓴 글이다. 다양한 문장구조를 사용한 점이 돋보이지만, 관사 특히 정관사 “the”를 사용하는 데 소홀한 것이 문제다. 때때로 정관사를 사용했다면 수정을 덜 했을 것이다. 나는 이 글에 거의 40번에 가까운 정관사를 집어넣었다. 어떤 사람들은 관사가 중요하지 않다고 생각해서 관사를 사용하는 것을 꺼리기도 한다. 그러나 관사는 매우 중요하고, 관사를 제대로 사용하기 위해서는 많은 연습을 해야 한다. 많은 사람들이 글의 마지막에 집중력을 잃어버리는 경향이 있는데 이 점을 유의해야 한다.
주간동아 602호 (p92~93)